Maturity, contrary to what some may believe, has nothing to do with age, but with experiences , what we learn from each of them and our actions.
But what does it mean to be mature? From a psychological point of view, and in very general terms, we could say that maturity is the level of psychological functioning that people reach and that allows them to respond to situations appropriately and adaptively.
In adolescence, that stage so full of changes, where our children may feel that we do not understand them , it is difficult for us to connect with them or where they may feel lost, it is also where they find certain situations that make them mature little by little.
But, specifically in adolescence, what aspects of development, the way of being, acting and/or thinking, would denote maturity? How to know if our son is mature? We give you 11 keys.
11 signs of maturity in adolescence
In adolescence, as in any stage of life, people behave in a unique way , and we can never generalize behaviors, attitudes or ways of being or thinking.
Furthermore, what it means to be mature for one person may be a different thing for another; In this article we will focus on what we understand by maturity, in general, from a psychological point of view.
However, having said all this, we can speak, broadly speaking, of some signs of maturity in adolescence, understanding that these can appear at certain times , although not always (it is not something rigid). But what exactly are we talking about?
They take responsibility for their actions
One of the signs of maturity in adolescence is responsibility. Teenagers who already show a certain maturity are capable of understanding the consequences of their actions and being consistent with what they do , taking responsibility for it.
they are thoughtful
Although each person has a more reflective or more impulsive style, and that’s fine, the truth is that the ability to reflect, when necessary, is also acquired over the years and with experience.
Thus, adolescents no longer act so impulsively and always carrying what they feel, but rather begin to think about things before acting.
They manage their emotions
Another of the signs of maturity in adolescence has to do with their emotions. Emotional management is part of emotional intelligence, and involves learning to manage emotions, to channel them in a healthy and appropriate way.
It also entails distinguishing between the emotional and the rational parts of actions, learning to relativize situations and seek new points of view, etc.
This emotional management will help them not to always be guided by what they feel and to manage emotions that are not always easy to manage, such as frustration or anger.
They are more flexible
Mental flexibility is a skill that is also acquired over the years, although it can be worked on from a very young age.
This flexibility helps teens adjust to different life situations and understand that things can be seen from many different perspectives .
They are more tolerant of changes
Linked to the previous point, another characteristic of maturity in adolescence is tolerance for change.
It is also the acceptance of the impermanence of things and of the different times they go through (knowing that neither the good lasts forever, nor the bad either).
They start thinking about what they want to do
Another of the signs of maturity in adolescence is having more or less clear goals, aspirations in life.
Thus, this search to know what one wants goes beyond having the need to be independent , something so characteristic of adolescence, and implies starting to set goals in life to get where you want to go.
Put aside selfishness
Mature adolescents no longer think only of themselves (or at least not always), that is, they begin to put aside that selfishness that characterizes adolescence.
Although logically empathy appears before , the truth is that this empathy and the fact of thinking more about others are also signs of maturity at this stage of life.
They are able to ask for help
Asking for help or advice, although it may seem otherwise, is not an easy thing. And less so in adolescence, a stage in which introversion, rigidity or difficulties in opening up to others and asking for comfort when needed may appear more than ever.
Therefore, this ability to recognize that one is wrong and to seek help outside also denotes maturity.
They cultivate their own criteria
Another characteristic of this maturity in adolescence is the cultivation of one’s own criteria, when it comes to thinking, being and acting.
Thus, adolescents form their own opinions and decide based on them, less influenced by the environment .
Respect other points of view
Although they are cultivating their own criteria, adolescents are also capable of respecting the points of view of others. That is, understand that not all of us think the same, and that is fine.
Practice active listening
Maturing adolescents are also increasingly capable of practicing active listening, a very important tool in interpersonal communication .
This skill involves actively and mindfully listening to others. That is, stop “listening to respond”, to start “listening to understand”.
The importance of accompanying them towards this maturity as parents and how to do it
As fathers and mothers, it will not always be easy for us to accompany our children on this path towards adolescence and adulthood, but with love, respect and empathy we can achieve it.
We know that it is a complex stage, that is why our children need our support, because on many occasions they can feel alone or lost . Some ideas that can help us as fathers and mothers to promote this maturity in our children are:
- Respect their rhythms and their space.
- Ask from curiosity, stimulating them to open up to us.
- Avoid imposing, judging or questioning .
- Favor quality time and spaces with them ( find shared interests ).
- Communicate with them from assertiveness.
- Respect their points of view and their freedom, while still establishing rules and logical limits.
Photos | Pexels, Freepik
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