There are many parenting decisions and practices that are frequently questioned. One of them is co-sleeping, on which I have already established my position in favor of it and I have defended it here as in my personal blog. Although there are many families who practice it , it is still something that tends to receive comments that are not always positive.
According to some people, sleeping with our children can make them dependent and insecure, despite the fact that this is not true and that many other factors can influence this to happen. I remember like many other new moms, at some point I came to believe this, until I read about its benefits and changed my mind when I started co-sleeping with my daughter .
Although there is no specific age when parents should stop co-sleeping , I have found mothers in parenting groups on social networks, desperate and asking for help because their children of six, seven and even eight years old sometimes return to their home. bed at night.
So this time I would like to share a brief reflection addressing this issue, because surely more than one family has met their son who is already “older” returning one night to the parents’ bed , and has wondered if this there is something wrong with it.
The magic of the parents’ bed
Why do children keep coming back to our beds, even when they are older? The answer is simple, but at the same time profound. The easiest thing is to say that it is because there they will be accompanied by the people who love them and have cared for them since they were babies.
However, it is much more than just being accompanied. The parents’ bed represents a place of peace, warmth, security. A magical place where all fears disappear, and where any discomfort is less.
How many times has a child, frightened by a nightmare, not woken up and then run to his parents’ bed? Something similar happens when they get sick. They could stay in their room, yes. But being with them helps them feel better, giving them that much-needed peace of mind at those times .
Why you shouldn’t worry
Do you remember that stage when your children were babies and you wondered how long they would sleep through the night? Well, something similar applies to co-sleeping and also for those moments when your child returns to your room.
As we know, children’s dreams are evolutionary. It is something that little by little is changing . One night your baby cannot sleep more than three hours in a row, and suddenly, he sleeps the whole night without any problem. At a certain age you cannot imagine sleeping anywhere other than your bed, when one fine day you announce that you want to sleep in your own room.
The same happens with other aspects of our children’s sleep, and those nocturnal visits to the parents’ bed, when they already sleep in their own room, will also diminish with the passage of time, until eventually they will no longer return.
So if this still happens occasionally and does not represent a major problem, do not worry and enjoy these nights when your little one returns to your side . Our children will be small (and not so small) only once.
As we mentioned a while ago, there is no deadline to stop sharing a bed with our children, as this varies according to the needs and decisions of each family. In the meantime, enjoy your children and fill them with love on those nights when they still need your arms.
Photos | Pexels, Unsplash
In Babies and more | Why do I keep holding my daughter in my arms when she asks for it even though she is not so small anymore, Letter from a mother who no longer has a baby in her arms, for mothers who still have one
