Staying with friends or family can be a great way to spend time with loved ones and save on accommodation costs. Being a guest can also be stressful. Here are some dos and don’ts to help make your guest’s experience one that you and your hosts want to repeat.
Actions to avoid
Don’t show up unannounced unless you are experiencing a true emergency. Even then, try to make a phone call before you arrive.
Please do not arrive before or after your scheduled arrival time unless you notify your hosts in advance. Your hosts may be cleaning or shopping at the last minute, and they will certainly worry if you don’t show up on time.
Don’t bring a pet , even an outdoor animal, without asking. Forever.
Don’t plan on making long distance phone calls or using your hosts’ computer without asking for permission. Bring a cell phone or calling card so you don’t pile up your phone bill. If you have been given permission to use your host’s computer, resist the urge to rearrange your computer files without asking, no matter how strange or cluttered those files may seem.
Don’t expect your hosts to take time off to show you around. If they offer to do so, you can accept it graciously. Once you’ve agreed on a sightseeing schedule, do your best to stick to your plan so your hosts know what to expect. Remember that your hosts will appreciate some time to regroup and relax.
Don’t put your hosts’ dishes where you think they should go ; put them where your hosts normally store them. The same applies to groceries, newspapers, and laundry.
Do not keep your hosts, or your children, up late if you are staying for a night from work or school.
Don’t forget to express your gratitude , preferably both during your visit and in a thank you note.
Winning guest shapes
Talk about your travel plans before you arrive. Your hosts will want to know if you plan to see things on your own or depend on them for assistance and transportation. If they don’t mention sightseeing or day trips, ask about spending time together to explore local landmarks.
Mention any medical conditions or dietary restrictions you have that affect your hosts’ meal planning. Offer to bring special foods, like gluten-free pasta, yourself so your hosts don’t have to buy them.
Ask before using the iron, washing machine and other appliances. You don’t want to break something because you didn’t know how to use it properly.
Create a daily plan for your visit. If you won’t be home for dinner, let your hosts know in advance and stick to your plan.
Ask about the daily routine of your hosts , especially if you are visiting during the work week. Be sure to adjust your plans so your hosts can get ready for work or school on time. If you expect to start early, make sure two people can shower at the same time before turning on the faucet.
Bring a gift or offer to invite your hosts to dinner. They’ve probably taken the time to clean your home and prepare for your visit, and they’ve certainly spent money on extra groceries. Be sure to express your appreciation not just out loud but in a tangible way. If your budget is limited, consider bringing a family keepsake, photos, or other gift with personal meaning.
Offer help and listen carefully to the response of your hosts. If they say, “No, thank you,” they mean it.
Keep your guest room and bathroom clean and tidy . It is not courteous to do extra work for your hosts.
Invite your hosts to stay at your home on a future visit. Do your best to be available if you are asked to stay with you.
Relax and enjoy your free time with your hosts. You can go sightseeing anywhere, but you can only deepen a family relationship or friendship by spending time together.
The golden rule for guests
When in doubt, remember the golden rule: do to others what you would like them to do to you. Think about how you would like a guest to behave in your home and act accordingly.
