Why do we complain? Surely not to torture others with our negativity. The truth is that, most of us enjoy lamenting in order … to feel something better, to ‘unload’ some of that discomfort that torments us. But what does science say about it? Is it bad to complain?
According to Steven Parton , writer and student of human nature, complaining affects the brain and has serious negative repercussions for mental health. In fact, complaining can literally kill us.
We already know that the brain constantly performs a large number of synapses. In our brain, neurons are separated by an empty space called a synaptic cleft. Every time we have an idea, a thought, a synapse shoots a chemical through this gap, creating a bridge that an electrical signal will cross. “ Every time this electrical charge is activated, the synapses are grouped together to decrease the distance that this electrical charge has to cross : the brain changes its own circuits, to make the triggering of thought easier and more likely “, clarifies Parton.
What effect does this have? That if we have negative thoughts we habitually condition our brain to be more pessimistic. Not only does thinking negatively repeatedly make it easier to think negative things more often, it also makes negative thoughts more likely to come to us at random. Basically complaining often makes when it comes time to form another thought, the thought with the ‘shortest path’ in our brain, to be the negative versus the positive (which will have the ‘longest bridge’).
The fact of continuously complaining about everything and with the consequent change in the synapses of the brain, also leads to a weakening of the immune system , increasing blood pressure and increasing the risk of suffering from heart disease, diabetes or even obesity.
Empathy is a good resource to remove that negativity from our brain, because when we see someone experiencing joy, for example, our brain ‘tests’ that same emotion by trying to make those same synapses. Thus, surrounding ourselves with happy and cheerful people can strengthen our positivity and weaken our negativity.
In this whole process, and as we might imagine, stress does not help us to drive away negativity either. Being negative we release more cortisol, the stress hormone. High levels of this hormone interfere with “learning and memory, immune function and bone density … and the list goes on,” says Parton.
