It has been a year since we were preparing to celebrate a homebound Father’s Day, as we could never have imagined. This year is also different from what we were used to, which the pandemic allows us, but we can have a good time at home paying homage to dad with little details that will make him very happy.
This Father’s Day we wanted to ask them, the parents, how they have lived this year of pandemic, how they have handled the confinement and what reflection they do about fatherhood in times of coronavirus.
Without a doubt, the pandemic has taught us great lessons after everything we have been through, and although there have been bad moments, many parents emphasize that it has also brought positive things. We have asked parents what the best and worst of living in a pandemic with children has been for them .
“So many hours together force you to do an exercise in superior patience”
Carlos Roberto , father of two children, 16 and 8 years old:
“The teenager has spent all the confinement secluded in her room. Perhaps trying to impose” absurd rules “such as that you cannot spend all day in your pajamas, you have to get up and have breakfast the same if you go to class as if you connect from home, It leads you to generate some tension or anger, but nothing serious.
With the little one, who has autism, in the worst of the pandemic it was time to be closer to him. I worked from home, I helped him teach him to add with the help of an abacus and to progress with writing or reading. That means spending more time together and being closer.
The best thing, being able to spend more time especially with the little one, the older one is already more independent. The worst, that so many hours together many times force you to do an exercise of patience greater than what you can resist. Losing patience with them at specific moments, for things that later you realize that maybe they were not so important. “
“The pandemic has delayed emancipation processes”
Antonio , father of two children:
“At home, the pandemic has delayed emancipation processes. My boy, who at the age of 12 was beginning to detach himself, going much more to the peer group as a reference to spend time and to understand his place, suddenly he has become much more attached in all the senses.”
“I was able to spend more time with my daughter and I appreciate it”
Ramón , a two-year-old daughter:
“I am grateful to the pandemic for having been able to enjoy my daughter more time. Before I traveled a lot for work and I missed many important moments.
The pandemic forced us to stop and stay home, so I was able to spend more time with her. Now we play, cook, sing, dance and what I enjoy the most is bath time. “
“It is being a time to value more than ever what we have”
David, three children ages 11, 7 and 5:
“The relationship with my children has been strengthened in this time, because spending a year working from home has allowed me to know more about their day to day and their routines, something that until now I had missed because I was working outside. Now I can wake them up by In the morning, prepare breakfast for them and when work allows me, even take them to and from school.
This time has also helped me connect more with my oldest son, who is about to enter adolescence, and with his emotional needs during this pandemic.
In short, it is being a time of inner growth, of union and of valuing what we have more than ever. “
“It has been a positive experience at a family level”
Miquel , father of a three-year-old girl:
“This pandemic year has been a roller coaster for everyone, also for the little ones, but despite the bad times, I think it has been a positive experience at a family level. It helped that the little one, who was two years old at the beginning of quarantine, understood the situation quite well and has always been very spirited.
The best has been spending more time together. The worst, the moments in which, as a result of our own anxiety and overwhelm, we were little patient with her. But I would not say that our relationship has changed substantially, we have always been very close. “
“I know we were reconnecting as a family “
Juan, father of Paula (18 years old) and Yago (14 years old):
“When your children are young you spend with them all the time that your work allows and you share activities and hobbies. When they grow up, it is the opposite. They make their own plans and it seems that they never have a hole in their” busy “schedule for you ( rather they do not want to take it out): all the plans are with their friends and when they are at home it is difficult for them to look up from their mobiles.
The pandemic has changed all this. During the confinement, at first they spent most of the time in their rooms, with video calls, playing Play or devouring everything that was published on social networks. But often as the days went by, the routine and boredom began to take their toll and they sought our company more and we managed to regain customs that we had completely lost : eating and dining together every day (when in normal times it is impossible because each of us has their class schedules, work, training …), have an aperitif in video calls with grandparents, uncles and cousins, and even conversations about the fear that we all felt.
Although I certainly had to quarrel with the little boy to make him study something and put down the game console, I did feel that we were reconnecting as a family. Every day we went to the door of the house to applaud all together, without arguing, without protesting.
So there was also less reason to argue, there was more harmony between us and despite all that the pandemic implied, we ended up adjusting to the new reality.
We also learned to discuss our plans, illusions, needs when the doors of our houses were opened and we started riding our bikes, going for a run or simply walking, to breathe. And each plan was short-term . We no longer thought about what we would do next year, only next week, and each achievement was a cause for joy. I think we learned to enjoy more things that seemed normal to us before. In short: although even today we are learning to live in a pandemic, within all the bad things that it has brought us, it has also helped me to reconnect with my children. “
“The little ones adapt to any situation”
Jesus , two sons of 15 and 12 years:
“After a year of pandemic, I am left with a clear confirmation of how well and quickly the little ones adapt to any situation (we have a lot to learn from them).
Although it has been hard, especially the first weeks with the total confinement, the truth is that in general lines we coped very well. My only regret is that being of an essential age to share time with friends, make new friends and live new experiences … it could not have been, but at least we are healthy and when everything passes, it will remain in a memory. “
“The best thing has been spending more time with my son”
Miguel , father of a 21-month-old boy:
“The best thing has been spending more time with my son. The pandemic broke out only a few months after he started to go to the nursery and enjoying his first year of life at home is priceless. It has also motivated us a lot to move forward in a complicated situation. In the end, having a baby at home does not get you bored. It has been very tiring, but let’s say we had a clear goal in life and we weren’t thinking about what we were not doing. I’m sure I would have lived Much worse this situation with 20 years than with a child who was 9 months old when the pandemic broke out, which in the end was going to occupy you all the time anyway.
And worst of all, the weeks we were both working, we had to take turns being with him and it was hell. Also not being able to pull the grandparents to rest something. It has been very intense. And our house is very small and in the end it was very cramped.
In Babies and more | Fatherhood changes men’s brains
