In recent years, the number of premature births has increased and so has the survival rate and absence of sequelae of babies, but for parents it is always an unexpected and hard event that provokes diverse reactions. These are seven normal feelings if you are a mother or father of a premature baby .
A whirlwind of feelings and sensations will take over the parents at first and some will probably give way to different ones as the days go by, when we become more aware of the situation. If you have been through this situation, you will know these feelings.
Fear for the baby’s life
Fear of losing the baby, of not getting ahead, of the consequences . Ask the doctors anything that worries you, since most of the time there are no serious consequences of a premature birth. But it is better to know the details than to be uninformed, as uncertainty and fear increase.
Fear of not knowing how to take care of it
There is also the fear of not knowing how to take care of him, of hurting him . They are so tiny and fragile that any movement worries us. Let yourself be advised by the medical staff, very used to dealing with these babies, who will tell you how to take them, how to do the Mother Kangaroo method …
Misunderstanding of the environment
When you have the feeling that no one understands what we are going through . Neither friends nor family find words of support or they are not what we expect. Sometimes we may think that even the doctors or the partner themselves do not understand us. This brings a feeling of loneliness.
Blame yourself
Feeling of guilt, derived from concern for the baby and uncertainty about his future. Many parents wonder why this is happening to them , looking for “what have they done wrong”, because they think they are to blame for the child’s situation.
But, although there are circumstances that can favor them, the majority of premature births have no known cause.
Denial of the situation
After the initial shock of the premature birth, it makes you want to flee from reality , to escape.
Ambivalent feelings
They may feel conflicting emotions . On the one hand, the desire to join their child and the fear of losing him, that something will go wrong, but on the other hand, it can lead to a time when they do not want to see the baby.
Lack of bond
Especially if you have not been able to have much contact with the baby due to his delicate situation. Increasingly, parents are allowed to be close to their child for longer, but there are cases, in extreme prematurity, in which parents can hardly be with the baby until it stabilizes.
Remember that with love, contact and the necessary care for the required time, premature babies get ahead . You have to take time, be patient and remain calm in the face of this rain of feelings that worry us, frighten us, take away our sleep.
Soon you will have the baby at home and everything will be much easier than when you have to be separated more than you would like.
Photo | iStockphoto
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