For the man to accompany the woman when she is going to give birth, and if it is not the partner, another companion, is an act whose benefit is beyond dispute: the woman is accompanied by someone who is trustworthy and close, who supports her in everything. moment .
However, when the delivery that the woman expects does not happen, when everything is truncated and a cesarean section must be performed, many hospitals then go into “emergency” mode and leave the woman alone, without the possibility of anyone accompanying her, precisely when you are most afraid and need the most support.
Many hospitals, but not all. There are those who have understood what we are now going to explain: why in case of cesarean section the father should be able to accompany the mother.
When can the father accompany the mother if the delivery is by cesarean section
It cannot be always, not in all conditions, because a cesarean section is performed in an operating room, it is a medical act (we could say that delivery is not so much, since it is the mother who gives birth) and the father does not leave of being a person outside the service.
The woman can be with a companion if:
- Both she and the baby are fine, and no major complications are expected after the cesarean.
- The anesthesia is regional and the mother is awake . In the event that general anesthesia had to be performed, the process is more complicated, more urgent, and then there can be no follow-up nor, in fact, does it make much sense.
- The person who will be with the mother gives her consent to be present and is not particularly sensitive to these processes: if she gets dizzy easily, she had better leave her position to someone else .
- The companion takes into account that in the event of any complications, they must leave the operating room.
Why all hospitals should allow the father to be in case of cesarean section
Actually, there is not much to say, because the logic is the same that explains why it is better for a woman to give birth with her partner giving her support and affection, accompanying her in those moments that can be very special, but also very hard for him. pain and intensity (and because it is still an act of love between them and the logical thing is that the woman wants him to be present and that he wants to be present), but in case someone has doubts and if in a hospital they think that there is no benefit, we explain it below:
- Because if the woman was thinking that her delivery would be vaginal, if she was prepared for it, the one ending in a cesarean section is a major blow that scares, increases anxiety and nerves and makes her lose some of her self-esteem : ” I have not been able to give birth. ” In those moments, the affection and love of a couple can be very beneficial because it is there, at all times, by your side, to tell you how proud you are of her and how well she is doing .
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Because immediately comes the feeling of guilt, looking for the reasons why everything ends like this and the desire that the baby is well and that he has not been harmed by something that he has been able to do or not do: as it is not a time for regrets or If she is blaming herself, the support of the father can be decisive so that she does not experience the arrival of her baby with so much anguish .
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Because, as a father, it is not the same to be there and see your newborn child, than to see him a few minutes later, when he has already been separated from his mother, without knowing what happened or how it happened . For both the mother and the father, being linked to the baby in time and space is very beneficial: if they see him come out and do not lose eye contact, or continue with them, it is a closer relationship than if the father does not see him being born and he does not share the same place … if he later sees him in a foreign place, alone, separated from his mother (if you want to read more about it, I recommend this post: Mom and baby, do not separate you at birth: separation can affect attachment in your relationship).
- Because since the father is there, she is not alone at any time and when they go to the resuscitation room, the three continue together, and she may be recovering with her baby skin to skin , who does not lose contact with her, being calmer, regulating better temperature and having the opportunity to make his first breastfeed . In many hospitals, when the mother is alone in resuscitation, they are separated by about two hours, which is how long it takes for the mother to go to the room where the father is with the baby (if the baby is not in the nursery ) . Those two hours is enough time for the baby to latch on to the breast worse and thus make present and future breastfeeding difficult. In other hospitals, whose protocols are older, those two hours can be even longer: I have come to hear midwives say that in their hospital at least 9 hours, which is a real madness and nonsense for mother and child.
- Because when the mother can leave the resuscitation room, she will go with her baby and her partner, the three of them to the room, in a process in which they will only have separated at the time of anesthesia. If afterwards they have been together and have been able to remain united at all times, the three of them, the satisfaction of both parents is much greater, as well as the involvement with the baby and with the family they have just created (does that “family , united, will never be defeated “?).
What do you think? Could you be accompanied during the cesarean section? Would you rather have been if it wasn’t possible?
Photos | iStock
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