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11 phrases you should not say to a mother who gives the bottle

Although we know that breast milk is the best food for the baby during its first months of life, some women cannot breastfeed or simply choose not to , and it is a decision that must be respected, since only she knows the circumstances by which it is made that decision.

However, sometimes this choice makes them the target of criticism and negative comments. We share 11 phrases that you should not say to a mother who gives the bottle .

But if breast milk is the best …

Something so obvious can become annoying, because although it is true that there are still some people who believe certain myths about breastfeeding (such as that their milk does not fill them or is not enough), it is well known that breast milk is the best food And if, for some reason, the mother does not give it to her baby, it is not to assume or tell him that it is the worst.

All women can breastfeed

This is false, because although it is true that most women have the ability to breastfeed their baby, sometimes there are health circumstances that simply do not allow it and that can be a sensitive issue for the mother . So you don’t have to assume anything.

Breastfeeding is easier

It is true that preparing a bottle correctly is more laborious than “simply” breastfeeding a baby, so superficially said yes, it is “easier” to breastfeed. Although this is not entirely true, since there are various circumstances and situations that can make breastfeeding difficult , making it more complicated and exhausting for the mother. Both have their advantages and disadvantages.

Formula has a lot of chemicals

Yes, formula contains chemicals but it is still the best alternative to breast milk (and the safest) . If a woman cannot breastfeed her baby, or if she does not want to, it is best to give her formula milk and no homemade inventions, no matter how processed it is and no matter how much it comes from a laboratory.

The formula is worse because …

True, there are many things breastfeeding proves best at, it has countless benefits for mom and baby! But to say that artificial milk will make them fatter or less intelligent (both unlikely), is only a comment that generates guilt in mothers.

It will be sicker

Similar to the above, we have this one that reminds us that yes, breast milk is the best for the baby and it even adapts to each stage of his life. However, and highlighting what we have already commented previously, we do not know the reasons why the mother could not or did not want to breastfeed .

You didn’t try hard enough

Who are we to question or point to a mother about the effort she made (or did not) to breastfeed her child? For a mother who tried to breastfeed, but ultimately failed, these kinds of comments can be very harsh, and I say this from personal experience, because although I tried to breastfeed exclusively my daughter ended up receiving mixed breastfeeding and for a long time I felt that I had failed .

Don’t you think you’re selfish?

This reminds me of the typical question that working moms are asked: don’t you feel bad about leaving him with someone else to further your career? Both are questions that make the mother fall into guilt about her decisions, which, as we have said and repeated, are personal and we must respect them.

With those breasts you would surely have been able to breastfeed him

Breast size has absolutely nothing to do with the ability to breastfeed a baby or the amount of milk produced. Having clarified this, it must be said that this phrase only indicates two things: that whoever says it does not know anything about breastfeeding and that they pay too much attention to the appearance of others.

They won’t have such a strong bond

One of the most beautiful things about breastfeeding, at least from my personal experience, is that it is one of the most beautiful bonds between mom and baby. However, in addition to not being the only way, it is not what defines whether or not we will have a strong bond with our children .

You must do it for your baby

Finally, a phrase in the sense of “duty” of mothers. We will always try to do the best for our children. But when the situation becomes difficult, exhausting or even affects our mental health, it is convenient to do things, too, for ourselves .

I want to remember that in the end, I fully support breastfeeding and this is not about whether breast milk is better than artificial milk, but about understanding that there are women who cannot breastfeed or decide not to, and that does not make them worthy of any. of these phrases .

In a few days, I’ll share the opposite: the phrases we should not say to a breastfeeding mother.

Photo | Pexels

In Babies and more | “He is my son and I do what I consider”, the firm response of Paula Echevarría to who criticizes her for giving the bottle to her baby, “Fed is Best” pays tribute to all mothers feeding their babies, breast or bottle

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