There is an empirical and definitive argument for not falling into this error. Aside from the ethical issues – it does not seem moral to bring a child into the world for such a selfish reason – the statistical data is against this strategy. And it is that those who have tried to save their relationship based on procreating often forget that having a child is, among other things, a major source of stress .
In fact, according to a recent study by the Max Planck Institute for Demographic Research in Rostock (Germany), the decline in vital well-being during the year following the first birth is even greater than that caused by unemployment, divorce or the death of a child. co-worker. The reason is that the arrival of a child at home completely alters the way the family is constituted.
As the anthropologist Martine Ségal explains in her book À qui appartiennent les enfants? ("Who owns the children?"), The couple ceases to be the center of attention when a child comes into the world. Vital rhythms are altered depending on the newborn, conjugal leisure is reduced to a minimum , it is easy for some of the members to feel emotionally abandoned and discussions arise about the distribution of effort in care. Like any stressful situation, this involves a couple test . Those that work well survive that moment of tension and end up experiencing it as positive stress. Those that already failed collapse.
