Do you feel like your teenager doesn’t feel like anything? What do you lack motivation? Or maybe, do you see that everything “happens” directly? Is it difficult for him to communicate with you and has a great need to be alone without being disturbed?
In these cases, we may speak either of apathy, or of a state of pasotism, two concepts that are related but have their nuances. What is the difference between them? Why do these symptoms appear in our children during adolescence and how to address them?
What is apathy?
Apathy is defined as ” the lack of emotion, motivation or enthusiasm “; it implies a feeling of indifference towards things. In a state of apathy, the person does not respond to aspects of their emotional, social or physical life. In other words; you feel unmotivated, not wanting to do things.
Thus, apathy implies a loss or decrease of motivation , in different aspects of life:
- Goal-directed behaviors (for example, going to the gym to feel better).
- Cognitive activity (for example, performing in studies, concentrating …).
- Emotional expression (for example, verbalizing emotions).
Apathy can be more or less intense, but in more severe cases, it can significantly interfere with the life of the person (in this case, the adolescent).
Differences with “pasotismo”
Although the terms are sometimes confused, it is important to differentiate apathy from “pasotismo” , a common behavior in adolescents.
When we speak of pasotism, we refer rather to an attitude of disinterest and indifference towards things, but this attitude is not born so much from a lack of motivation, but from a little involvement or commitment to things.
Sometimes, even with “pasotismo” we are referring to a defiant attitude, of detachment or unconcern towards things . Thus, although they are similar concepts, apathy and “pasotismo” present their nuances.
In this article we will focus on the two concepts, both in apathy as a state of lack of motivation, enthusiasm or desire to do things, as in idleness, as slightly different concepts.
Why does this apathy or apathy appear in some adolescents?
Tiredness
Tiredness can be one of the possible causes of apathy and apathy in adolescents. This state implies a lack of strength, especially physical, especially due to a lack of rest.
Thus, when feeling tired, it may seem that things do not matter to them, or that they are directly less involved in them.
Fatigue
Fatigue is not exactly the same as tiredness; in this case we are talking about a lack of energy and motivation , and a rather mental fatigue (mental saturation).
Fatigue can be a normal response to physical exertion, boredom, lack of sleep or emotional stress, and it is often this fatigue that causes this difficulty in self-motivation (apathy).
Lack of sleep or non-restorative sleep
Closely related to the previous causes, in this case lack of sleep or non-restorative sleep may also be causing apathy or apathy. It is logical that if we do not rest well, we do not have as much energy or initiative to do things.
That is why it is so important to promote adequate sleep in our children, for example through good sleep hygiene (measures designed to facilitate sleep before going to sleep).
Boredom
Boredom is another possible cause of apathy and apathy. This condition is defined as a ” reactive state of emotion “; In this state, we interpret the condition of the environment as tedious, either due to the lack of stimuli (“having nothing to do”) or the appearance of repetitive or tedious stimuli.
Inactivity
It is like that; the fact of doing little , makes each time we have less desire to do things. Has it ever happened to you? Thus, inactivity can be another cause of apathy, and to a lesser degree, of idleness.
Depressive symptoms
Apathy is one of the symptoms of depression. With this, we are not saying that because your teenager feels listless or unmotivated, he has depression, but that apathy is one of its symptoms.
Therefore, if you see your child especially apathetic, it is important to be attentive to his behavior, and also observe how he feels, what is beyond that apathy, etc. Sometimes apathy may be covering up depressive symptoms .
Not finding the motivation
Your adolescent child may also be apathetic because he does not find any motivation that “hooks” him , a hobby , something that he likes, that arouses his interest … Be it in the academic, personal, social, etc.
And thus, the fact of not having their own tastes and motivations defined yet (sometimes, in part, due to the immaturity of this stage itself), can translate into apathy or lack of interest.
Adolescence itself
Finally, adolescence itself is another direct cause of apathy and / or passotism. Why? Because, as you well know, we are talking about a complex stage , full of physical, hormonal, social, academic changes …
And with all these changes (and the appropriate adaptations), oscillations in the adolescent’s mood and behavior ensue, which can translate, on some occasions, into apathy or apathy.
How to deal with apathy and apathy in adolescents?
How to address these symptoms in our children? First of all, to insist that, as we have seen, apathy and apathy are not exactly the same. Broadly speaking, what differentiates both concepts is the cause of that state in question.
Apathy arises from a state of general demotivation , while passotism is sometimes due to more challenging behaviors, the need for reaffirmation typical of adolescence, the search for autonomy, the fact of closing in on one’s own world , to emotional difficulties, etc. We emphasize this difference because, depending on each case, the approach will be different.
Some ideas that can help us, and to start, are:
- First, identify what your child is manifesting ; if apathy or apathy.
- Offer your support; verbalize that you are by their side, without the situation becoming a taboo subject.
- Ask him directly; what’s wrong with him, why do you think he feels this way …
- It fosters a space for dialogue and communication.
- Propose family plans.
- Help him explore his tastes and preferences.
- Start small, with some activity that “breaks” that state of apathy.
- Especially in the face of “foolish” behaviors, explore what’s behind it: maybe sadness? Rage? Irritability? Need for isolation?
- Consult a professional if difficulties persist.
The important thing here is to delve into the causes of that apathy or pasotism; That is why communication is so important , in addition to other small actions that we can do as parents, such as: planning an activity that you like, surprising them with some fun and original plan …
And above all, do not make the mistake of “covering” this attitude with material things, because it will only be a short-term remedy.
Photos | Cover (pexels), Image 1 (pexels)
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