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How and when to tell your big brother that a baby is coming

When you are expecting your second baby, one of the most common things on your mind is when to tell your firstborn. If the arrival of another child changes our lives, it means a revolution for them.

Both the way and the moment of doing this depends on the age and maturity of the person (it is not the same to give the news to a child of three than to one of ten), but we must always be tactful in choosing both the moment and the words.

The ideal is to do it when a reasonable time has passed, we are sure that everything is going well and preferably when the belly begins to show . It is not good to do it well in advance because the child is going to make it eternal, and not even when the pregnancy is very advanced and they do not have enough time to assimilate it.

How do you tell your son that he is going to become a big brother?

If the child is very young , it is best to do it through stories, because in this way we do it through a resource that they like, and because they can see in a graphic way what is going to happen.

When I got pregnant, we chose “Laura and Mom’s Belly” , a story with very colorful illustrations that my daughter loved from the first moment … so much that in a short time it became the book I have read the most times in my life (and the record is still being held after several years). In it the children see the process of growth of the tummy, he explains to them that mother can no longer hold him in her arms and that sometimes she is tired and needs to lie down. It also prepares them for the “separation moment” when the baby brother is born and Laura has to go with her grandparents, and of course, for the moment when she will finally meet him.

In case the child is a little older, you can prepare that moment to make it special : preparing a box with a gift and a message inside, having dinner with the family with their favorite dish or sharing an activity that they really like to do.

Regardless of the age of the child, we must always show them a positive outlook for the future : ” a baby will come who will be your best companion for games and adventures “, “you will no longer have to play alone when mom and dad are busy ” , ” the baby will love you more than anyone in the world “, and all kinds of messages that empower him as a big brother.

What to do after breaking the news?

The best thing we can do after telling our son that he is going to become an older brother is to involve him with the arrival of the baby (without overwhelming him, of course): take him to choose clothes and toys for the new member of the family, allow him to be Who will give the news to family members and talk about the feelings that knowing that a baby is coming home produces in them.

Don’t be scared if jealousy suddenly starts to creep in. It is normal because little by little he is going to assimilate that another little person is going to come to occupy part of the attention of mom and dad (and the rest of the family, of course), but cultivate in him the message of the two of you. always available to him , which will always be the reason for our joy and that the baby who is about to arrive is very lucky to have him as an older brother.

In Babies and More | Nine tips to avoid sibling jealousy when the newborn arrives home

Image | freepik | senivpetro

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