The arrival of a baby at home is quite an event. And also a great mix of emotions. On the one hand, we feel full of joy to finally have him in our arms, but on the other, we also feel full of many doubts and fears typical of new mothers and fathers.
The first weeks with the baby are usually a lot of trial and error while we learn to handle this new role, so we have decided to make a small compilation of those frequent mistakes that new parents make and how to avoid them .
Waiting for the baby to adapt to our routine
I start the list with one of the mistakes that we very often make, especially if we are new parents: expecting the baby to adapt to the routine that we already had established. The reality is that the arrival of a baby turns our entire world upside down, and routines are not left out of this transformation .
Although it is true that there are many things that we must continue doing in the usual way, it is important to understand that it is not the baby who must adapt to our routine, but we to his. In those first few months, it’s important for us to be flexible and tailor our activities so that meeting your needs is our top priority .
have very high expectations
We could say that this second mistake is one that we start making even before the baby is born. And it is that when we prepare for the arrival of the baby, we begin to plan and make decisions about what we will do regarding its care, feeding and upbringing .
However, it is important to remember that each baby is unique and there is always the possibility that the decisions we made previously are not the best for ours or that it is not possible to carry them out for some reason. Like the previous point, being flexible and not making rigid decisions is key .
Not having control with visits
There are divided opinions about postpartum visits: some love and appreciate them, while others prefer to avoid them, at least during the first few days. Regardless of your decision or position on it, in both cases it is important to have control with the visits.
If we decide to have them, establish times when mom and baby feel comfortable to receive them (and preferably, help visits). If we decide not to have them, explain that we prefer privacy and perhaps propose a date for them to visit us later. Although we know that many people cannot wait to meet the baby, the comfort and peace of mind of mom and baby should always come first in both situations.
Taking the baby to crowded places
Although babies do not need absolute silence to be well, it is necessary that at least during the first weeks – let’s say, in what adapts to the world outside the womb – remain in a quiet environment . There will be time to teach him to be sociable later.
Also, let’s not forget that your immune system may not be fully developed , making you more vulnerable to germs and bacteria that may be present in places where many people gather or pass through. For now, visits at home or at the home of other relatives are enough, but yes, always following the proper recommendations on contact with small babies, such as washing your hands before touching them and not allowing them to kiss you.
not take him out of the house
Just because we don’t recommend taking you to crowded places doesn’t mean we should keep you locked up. There are mothers who are terrified of taking their baby out of the house because of everything that could happen to it, but extremes are not good either and we can take the baby out from the first day.
One of the best ways is to take a daily walk , which benefits everyone: the baby receives that sunlight necessary for the synthesis of vitamin D (always indirectly but without covering the stroller with a blanket), while mom takes little physical activity little by little and also disperses or clears up a bit of the routine at home.
This is one of the mistakes that parents most frequently make and that in many cases we continue to make when our children are no longer newborns: it makes us cold and we think that our children need another three layers of clothing, but it is not So.
In the case of newborns, many parents feel confused on this point because they know that their thermoregulatory system is not working very well yet. However, this does not mean that we should shelter them as if they were going to enter a freezer.
Let ‘s remember that babies should only wear one more layer of clothing than adults , while children should be warm just like us, preferably in layers, in order to put on or take off more or less as required.
bathe him every day
This is another example of a mistake we make by thinking that the baby’s needs are the same as ours, but a baby does not get dirty or sweat like an adult, and therefore it is not necessary or recommended to bathe him with so much water . frequency.
There is research that has proven that it is not advisable to bathe the baby every day, because in addition to the fact that his skin is more delicate, we would be removing the protective layer that his body creates naturally, and that protects him against environmental influences, infectious germs and bacteria. .
It is important to clarify that although we should not bathe him daily, there are parts of the body that we cannot neglect and we have to clean frequently: the diaper area, the neck area and the parts of his body where there are folds, such as armpits and groin.
Don’t follow your instinct
When we have a baby, we are inundated with advice from other people, but the ones who really know our baby (and better than anyone else) are us. In addition to the recommendations of the pediatrician, it is important to listen and follow your instinct.
If you feel that something is not right, do not stay with the doubt. If you are advised to do something, but it is not functional or practical for you or your baby, don’t follow it. Always do what’s best for your baby.
Don’t carry him any longer in your arms
Finally, and a mistake that I see that many parents make with their newborn and that even at the time I came to make and quickly regret, is not carrying him more time in his arms. Many of us are influenced by the famous “don’t take him, he gets used to it” , a phrase that we must eradicate.
The arms are a basic need of the baby and as such, we should not deny it. When you least expect it, your baby will have grown and from my own experience I tell you: you will miss having your baby in your arms. Your child will be small only once. Enjoy it.